Mother's Day Morning 2011

This morning Andie blew her nose into a sheet of Kleenex, then pulled out her iPod to illuminate the used Kleenex so she could look at her snot.

(Happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there!)

Adventures at Barnes & Noble

Just saw some amusing book titles at Barnes & Noble today:

(I was looking at the black book)

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Happy Easter!

"I did not have a nose job"

When I walked into class this morning this was the first item on my professor's agenda:

"No, I did not have a nose job. I had a skin cancer removed. Remember to wear sunscreen!"

(It was only after reading this that I noticed she had a band aid over her nose.)

10-year-old Girl Wants a Beard

Me: Do you guys know anyone from this list of celebrities? [reads random celebrity names]
Andie: Hm... [thinking, strokes beardless chin] I wish I had a beard to stroke.

*Andie is my 10-year-old cousin who often does and says random things, which is why she's featured in my blog a lot.

Pec Support

I was driving through the mountains today and I saw a man jogging wearing what looked like a green sports bra. He didn't have moobs or anything, but I guess some guys also need those things? Really did not know that until today.

Another Conversation with Ralph

Me: So I was reading this romance novel... you know what happens when people love each other?
Ralph: They make pancakes :)

Prisoner Wants Pen Pals

*This was actually a classified ad in the January 2011 issue of Harper's Magazine.