Justin Who?

My uncle frequently attempts to humor the family by tossing out punch lines and "jokes." My cousin is slightly obsessed with Justin Bieber, and in a continuing effort to be funny my uncle periodically asks her, "Do you like Justin Bieber [Beaver] or Justin Platypus? I like Justin Platypus."

Rotting Tooth

I was cleaning out some drawers today when I stumbled across an object that turned out to be my little cousin's rotting baby tooth. It must've been in there for at least a few months.

Klutz

Today I walked into a clothing rack, tripped on my left foot while walking down some stairs, and got my left hand scratched by my friend. Not one of my best days.

American Currency Only

I was on the bus today when this one guy came on and repeatedly failed to deposit a coin in the machine.

The guy said he didn't know that the bus, which was in America, didn't take non-American coins.

The bus driver, who was pretty pissed off and seemed like she hated her job, chucked the coin to the window and announced, "For those of you who don't know, we only take American currency. The machines are designed to filter out foreign currencies. We don't take $2 coins, pesos, or Chuck E Cheese [coins]."

Cockroach Chow Mein

I was strolling around Downtown L.A. today when I decided to grab some lunch with my friend at this Chinese restaurant that was recommended by my friend's coworker.

For a little over $4 I got a bowl with a lot of chow mein and some orange chicken. The place really looked like Panda Express, but it didn't charge nearly as much and I got more food, so I was pretty satisfied. But then I started eating some of the noodles and by the time I was about to shove my third fork down my throat I saw a baby cockroach in my chow mein. It was gray, it was dead (thank God), and it was really gross. The thought of the cockroach floating around in the noodles while it was being cooked made me hurl. Mentally anyway.

On the bright side, I suppose, I got my $4+ back from the extremely panic-stricken workers.

I really hope that was the only bug in my bowl of chow mein.